10.05.2012

insecure writer's support group - risk


well, i joined the insecure writer's support group: insecure writer's support group . it's a blog hop where the first wednesday of each month (yes, i'm late) writers blog about their insecurities, challenges, and fears over writing and how we've managed to get past, challenge and *hopefully* triumph over them (it's meant to be encouraging--stay with me here).

there isn't a monthly theme, so i'll just jump right in.


i must have been mulling around the idea of this post all night because i had an insecure writer's dream! husband and i were in california (no idea why) and decided to go to a book signing. i've been following shannon messenger's blog for some time now and her much anticipated debut novel was released this week. that being said, it would make sense that she was the author who's signing i was attending in dream.

as much as i know of her based on her posts, she's super sweet, funny, humble, and honest, but dream-shannon was a little more snarky. for some reason i'd written something in the book ( keeper of the lost cities ) for her to read before she signed it (i don't know) and after she read it, she questioned me as a writer, leaving me bumbling for words and wanting to shrink into my chair. she ended up forgiving my insecurities, signing my book, and husband and i went on to become key players in a highway car chase. BUT what was that bit on my writing about? i'm no dream analyzer, though it was something, wasn't it?

it took me a couple years to admit i was a writer. before our kids were school-aged i could be found waiting outside the doors of the coffee shop at 7 am sharp every saturday and sunday only to sit hours on end and write. finally the baristas started asking me what i was working on, to which i'd reply, "oh, i'm just getting some work done." soon that wasn't enough and it was, "so, what kind of work do you do?" until finally i had to fess up. it was embarrassing and liberating at once.

"i'm writing a novel." there. i said it. EXHALE.

i guess the point i'm rambling my way to is that it's good (therapeutic even) to own up to your dreams and goals--even if it's just to yourself. i'm a writer. i've written two novels and am working on my third.

now, notice i refer to myself as a writer. i won't be an author until i'm published, but that's a post for next month.



12 comments:

  1. Welcome to the IWSG! A little late is fine.
    From the dream, sounds like you have the 'am I good enough?' concern. It never totally goes away - we just learn to deal.
    And I'm sure Shannon wouldn't really mock your writing.

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  2. i'm sure she wouldn't either alex...crazy dream!!! thanks for starting IWSG, i'm loving it already :)

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  3. I wonder if this reluctance to "confess" is the same for a painter, a dancer, or a musician. Do you think? I wonder about that... what is it about saying you're a writer that is so scary for so many of us? I don't think someone who plays soccer for fun has a problem saying he/she is a soccer player...

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    1. i do too...it's interesting. i think for me, the idea of writing a novel was intimidating in and of itself. like if it wasn't going to be published or good enough to be published it would be seen as a big fat waste of time. or maybe it's because i have no formal training as a writer. i didn't go to school for it, have never taken a class, so who am i to think i can write a novel? hmm...

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  4. By the way, you have captchas (sp?) turned on... I'm risking the aggravation to post this second response in case it was a setting you weren't aware of?! I've heard blogger has a good anti-spam filter, so usually captchas aren't necessary... you might want to look into that, dear doppleganger, because some might see it as a deterrent to commenting... :)

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  5. I no longer call myself a writer, or an author. Just a story teller. Because I know I tell a good story, it's the writing part that's a challenge for me.
    With so many MSA and English teachers, and experts in grammar, I'm intimidated beyond the extreme, but it's because I know I don't have the grammar skills. I've tried to learn them. I have a BS and an MA, but I would flunk a first grade open book grammar test. It's dyslexia, it's a mental block, maybe it's just me. I've written two books and have a third in rewrite. I post my work on my blog and hope to entertain but I also hope for critiques that will help me to strengthen. Grammar is and always has been, my Achilles heel. My biggest my fear, I'll never be a real writer. My editor gets all the credit, but I can't afford to have someone peruse my blogs. So I fly by the seat of my pants! Sorry, this is something I've been haunted by for a long time.
    Thanks for posting!

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    1. i'm horrible with grammar too yolanda. i've learned a lot, but mostly wing it. thanks for sharing!

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  6. Isn't it one of the hardest things to say? I'm a writer. I write. Because the next thing out of people's mouths is, "Oh, when will it be published?" Lol. Congrats and Welcome to IWSG. :)))

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    1. that's it candilynn! totally part of the reason i don't want to say i'm a writer. because i'll have to admit defeat in the next breath. ;)

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  7. Welcome to the Insecure Writers. Strange dream but I want to hear more about the car chase.

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    1. thanks susan and yeah it was a good one ;)

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